I woke up to this day with a question; What type of Mom am I?
So I searched up Google and found out there are more different types of Moms, and I could relate myself to 3… Helicopter Mom, Free Range Mom and Breastfeeding Mom (but I don’t breastfeed anymore. I stopped when my youngest son was 2.6 years old – yeah, I know – that’s the longest I breastfed).
I won’t go to the other types of Mom today, I just want to concentrate on what I can relate to.
So what is a Helicopter Mom?
A Helicopter Mom is a Mom who follows their kids everywhere, speaks on behalf of their kids and manages their kids’ relationships. It is bought by the parents’ anxiety and the want to protect their children. If the parents are anxious, they may overprotect their children.
How about a Free Range Mom?
A Free Range Mom is a Mom who let their kids play outside without supervision and never micromanage their children’s lives. A Free-range mom is pretty laid back. You would see them in the playground conversing with other moms, not minding their kids.
Reading articles about these 2 types of parenting styles, I had a think… Which is which am I as a Mom? After defining the meaning of the two, I realized that Helicopter Mom and Free Range Mom is totally opposite to each other – and that I’m both of them.
Most of the time, I would say I’m a Helicopter Mom especially in the playground. But hey, my son is just 3 years old and I just can’t let him go on his own without supervision because first, I don’t like any accidents to happen. I don’t like the idea of broken bones, spinal fractures, contusion and abrasion and head injuries. First and foremost, if my child hit the bottom from a very high playground fixtures and hit his head or spinal cord badly, he may end up paralyzed. I know, that sounds gruesome but that’s how anxious Mom like me thinks. Just imagine if that happens I could never bring him back the way he used to be. So do you think following him around the playground is bad? or not giving him an opportunity to explore by himself outside has a bad effect on his future? I think not supervising him around public places and not being there to catch him if he falls would result to a terrible accident that I would regret for the rest of my life. I admit, my being a helicopter mom is brought by my anxiety. I was an anxious person and I would like to anticipate bad things that could happen and that leads me to overprotecting my children, but not all the time and not in every situation.
I could also say that I’m a Free Range Mom at times because I let my children explore on their own and I want them to experience new things that are not a part of our daily schedule. At times, I would allow them the freedom to do what they want to do outside and that includes exploring the bush, playing in mud, take risks (with caution) and basically experience what I didn’t experience when I was little. I had to confess that I was brought up by Helicopter Parents. I was bubble wrapped and never experience outdoors freely.
Free Range Moms are those Moms you see in the playground letting their child play in whatever way they want while they’re sitting and chatting with their friends. They’re the ones who don’t mind their children who can’t climb up the ladder yet, allow their 1 1/2 year old baby slide on their own, and not comforting their kids when they fall and bump. Yes, that’s the one! I have nothing against them… we’re all Moms who think we’re doing the best we can for our children.
I’m not that kind of Free Range Mom though, I’m more like letting them but still supervising them on what they’re doing. And that made me conclude that I’m both Helicopter and Free Range, if there’s such a thing. I’m not sure if I’m making sense here or maybe I’m just trying to defend myself from being a Mom that I am.
These 2 types of Mom which are very contradictory to each other is basically me as a Mom – that’s how I see myself. I sometimes am a helicopter mom (especially when my anxiety attacks) but when I see that I can let go of my children and there’s a great opportunity for giving them the freedom, I let them explore on their own (but I’m still watching at them)!
Saying this, I think it’s just about balance! Balancing is the key to good parenting! I sometimes let my kids go the way they want and other times, I’m the Mom who wants structure and wants things to go my way. I believe give-and-take is the best way in any relationship – even in a parent-child relationship. In this generation, parenting should be flexible!
We also know that too much of one thing is not good. So I would say let’s balance it out! Do what you think is right for your situation. All of us Mamas have valid reasons on why we are doing a certain parenting style(s). Whatever reasons it may be, you deserve a pat on the back because you’re doing your best and we know it!
So am I a Helicopter Mom or a Free Range Mom? I reckon, I’m a Balanced Mom! My parenting style would depend on the situation. It is flexible like that! As life is not always cruel… life is not always perfect! I have to keep it balanced!
How about you Mama? What type of Mom are you?